Green Is The The New Black

While scanning the magazine racks at the Bookshop Santa Cruz last weekend, I couldn't help but notice all the green. No less than six different magazines were running a "Green Issue" to capitalize on Earth Day. Outside Magazine had our Governator: the 10-16 miles to the gallon-loving, $59.62 cost of a fill-up oblivious, Hummer-driving California governor as poster boy for their green issue. To be fair, Schwarzenegger recently retrofitted his fleet of Hummers to run on biofuel. A gas-to-biofuel conversion–allowing the engine to run on ethanol, hydrogen, biodiesel or natural gas–gets the equivalent of up to 40 miles per gallon.

The conversion, which takes about seven days, costs roughly $24,000 (that's on top of the $50,000 price tag for the 2007 Hummer H2 or $130,000 for the 2006 Hummer H1) just to convert to biodiesel–and significantly more to burn the full gamut of alternative fuels. If diesel fuel sells for $3 a gallon, you'd have to drive around 140,000 miles before breaking even. At these prices, I don't see green California consumers running to the Hummer dealerships.

But what's wrong with the popular, and far more affordable Toyota Prius hybrid? Well, apparently Schwarzenegger is either something of a size queen or has compensation issues,

I wanted to show people that biofuel is not like some wimpy feminine car, like a hybrid. Because the muscle guys, they have this thing, 'I don't want to be seen in the little, feminine car'. You don't have to get rid of sport utility vehicles, you don't have to get rid of Hummers. We need to take the technology and make clean engines. That is the message.

Yup, that's the message... Don't reduce your driving or change your behavior, just cough-up the green needed to be green. Not quite the sustainable and immediate proposition that the current climate crisis demands, but apparently enough rhetoric to get you on the cover of a magazine.

In a much more impressive showing, Vanity Fair magazine ran its 2nd annual Green Issue with the absolutely lovable polar bear cub Knut staring adoringly (or perhaps hoping he's a seal, hungrily) at coverboy, environmentalist, and perennial hottie Leonardo DiCaprio. Notwithstanding its unapologetic devotion to consumerism and conspicuous consumption, this is no fluff green issue. VF takes on both wack-job Rush Limbaugh and Myron Ebell, climate change denier and Bush administration policy analyst, sound-bite artist, and oil-industry mouthpiece. Vanity Fair gets special points for their inclusion of the Minds Aquatic: a feature on ocean scientists and conservationists working to keep the ocean green... I mean blue, as well. East Coast/West Coast rivalries are set aside as Woods Hole Oceanographic Institution eco-stars share pages with Scripps Institution of Oceanography aqua-heroes. I suspect Vanity Fair readers are usually accustomed to putting their considerable money, well, wherever they want to. At least this issue gives them a chance to put their money where it can do some environmental good.